Sunday, June 1, 2014

Freedom.

 My grandfather passed away last week and though my family is certainly mourning the loss, we are also rejoicing in him being with his Maker in perfect wholeness and healing. This has me thinking about the abundant life that Christians have and what abundant life means.

It was a few years ago around this time when I sat my mother down on a rainy evening and confessed that an eating disorder had wrapped its gnarly fingers around my heart and my health. It would still be a few months before I allowed Hope to shine its rays into my darkness and anchor my soul to the mercy found at the feet of Jesus. And even when I came to the point where I personally wanted freedom from bulimia, I have an enemy who wants to destroy every inch of freedom achieved.
When I went to a Christian college for my first semester I learned to become more comfortable with my testimony. I learned to tell my story not out of shame or disgust, but out of the attitude of "look how Christ has walked with me in my struggles." In the past six months, however, the enemy has found some chinks in my defenses. These fiery arrows that were shot at my heart turned into valuable lessons. Maybe I have not handled these circumstances with great spiritual maturity in the heat of the moment, but I have walked away from them as a much stronger person. I have learned the great value of speaking words that bring life to myself and to others, the importance of bringing thoughts captive, and that my heart must first and foremost be submitted to the authority of Christ.

There are certain things that I find sometimes trigger negative thought patterns and actions. I think it is incredibly hard to speak kindly to myself when others speak negatively to their bodies (or mine). It also is more difficult to think kindly about my body after a day of splurging or not exercising, or when I am tired or stressed. So this evening, after a weekend consisting of potlucks dinners, buffet-style meals provided to my family, and unhealthy road snacks for the trip to my grandfather's funeral I was almost surprised to find myself showing grace to my body and speaking life instead of encouraging a downward spiral in my thoughts. I realized that I am FREE, so why should I expect myself to still act or think in the ways I did when I was chained by my sin?
This led me to think of just how far I have come and what it's like to taste abundant freedom in this life, to know that chains no longer shackle my heart but to know beyond any doubt that I AM FREE. Sometimes I am tricked into thinking that I have to earn more freedom and only can lose one little chain at a time. This is a lie. When I surrendered my heart to Christ, He bought my freedom. He did not buy a short supply or one chain at a time. He paid for it ALL.
In Christ, I am not my struggle. I am not defined by the authority I chained my heart to in the past. I am not bound by what the enemy says to me or about me. My worth is not determined by others.
Every wrong that I have done is swallowed up in the right of Christ and wrong done to Him. My chains are swallowed, death is beaten, and sin has lost the battle.

And so today I am thankful for the glorious and abundant freedom that I have found and I choose to proclaim His excellencies to others.



1 comment:

  1. Inspiring words. Thanks for sharing your story..

    ReplyDelete